262

I know it's still a big number.  But it's a helluva lot smaller than 315. That,s where I was 9 months ago.  I haven't seen 262 in at least 10 years!  Do it might be a big number still, but I'm happy to see it!  By this time next week, I shouldbe under 260!  Woohoo!  It's exciting to see the changes in my body.  I am still wearing clothes from before I had to take tucks in the pants! They are still too big but I refuse to buy new clothes yet!  I have some smaller ones somewhere in this house, just have to find them.

Thanks to everyone who is still reading my blog.  I know I have really fallen behind on posting on here.  So thanks for checking for new posts.  I will try to post more often.

Well I have stuff I wanted to do today so I am going to try to get something done before I fall back to sleep again.

Blind date part #2

I had to finish it in a different post because I couldn't get to the spot I had stopped at so I could finish my story!

So he takes me back to my van and says Hey this was fun we should do this again.  To which I say, Ok. Cause I'm a chicken!  He leans in to kiss me goodbye and I quickly turn my head!  He ended up catching my cheek.  Felt like I got hit in the face with a fish!!  Ewww.

I headed downtown to meet up with everyone who was waiting at the Frog for me.  He tried to get a hold of me again, but I quickly ignored him and deleted him.   Never again!!  No blind dates for this girl!

Blind date

I want to apologize for any and all typos in my blog.  I do know that I have some.  Sadly, trying to fix them when typing on my tablet is very frustrating.  That's why I give up trying to fix them.  I wouldn't have a blog at all if I kept trying to fix them.  I would have thrown this tablet against a wall!  It's great so I can play games and stuff, but trying to get to the right place to fix typos is hard!  It's touch screen and the cursor never goes where I want to!

I am very hapy to report that my dad has been going to his radiation!!  He has also been making it to his chemo and to get his fluids!  I am so proud of him! A couple of weeks ago he wasn't feeling very well and said he was done going.  That they are putting too many chemicals in his little body!  For those of you who don't know, my Daddy is only 100 pounds!  I know that's hard to believe, especially if you know my sisters and I.  We are all big girls!  Well, Lisa isn't anymore.  She has lost 113 pounds.  I won't be next year!

So I have been trying to think of what stories I can share on here. I have quite a few that are pretty funny.  But I don't want to type anything that will come back to haunt my kids!!  LOL  That cuts out alot of them!  I also don't want to post anything to upset my family.  There goes another good chunk of them!!  That doesn't leave much!!

Ok I think I have one.  Quite a few years ago, I was big into Yahoo chat rooms.  I have met a few people from them as well.  A few of them I still "talk" to as well.  I have met some good people.  That being said, I have met some that I wish I hadn't!  So I started talking to this guy from downstate, I really can't remember his name now.  Let's call him Joe.  Anyways, Joe and I had chatted for a couple of months.  We seemed to have a lot in common, movies, books, music, religious & political views, dancing.  Yeah, I said it, dancing!  I know it might not look like it, but I can cut a rugwhen I want to.  Course it might not be pretty, but I do love to dance!

Ok back to my story.  So Joe tells me that he has to come up here for work.  He was an insurance adjuster.  He had to come up here and wanted to take me out.  I agreed to dinner and then downtown for drinks and dancing.  An important part to the story is, I had never seen him.  He didn't have a picture.  I had a picture on my profile and never lied about myself.  I didn't think he was going to look exactly how he described, but I didn't know how far off his description was going to be!

I met him at the Comfort Inn.  I gotta tell ya, I looked GOOD to!!  I walked down the hall to his room, knocked on the door, and there he was.  He said he was 6'2", more like 5' 7".  He said he was 225 pounds, more like 325.  He said he had brown hair, he forgot to mention the comb over! I know, I know, don't be so shallow!  I mean, I am a big girl, so don't knock it that he's a big boy.  But I do!  I mean, I have a type.  Just like everyone else. It happens to be tall and skinny He was neither!  But, I cannot be mean, to his face.  I have to go through with the date.

He tries to invite me into his room.  Ahh NO!  I told him we should get going to dinner.  All the time trying to come up with a plan to get out of the date.  Did I mention that he had his pants pulled up to his chest with his dress shirt tucked into them?  He looked like an old college professor.  Not a hot one either!  Now I know I have no business making fun of the way he dressed when everyone knows that I dress like crap lately.  But back then, I dressed really nice.  I wasn't as big as I was recently.  I had some cute clothes.  I mean, I Looked GOOD!!

Ok back to the story...So we went to get in his truck to drive to Studebakers.  He wanted to take me to the Ojibway but I really didn't want anyone to see me! So I suggested Studebakers.   On the way there I stared telling him about my sick son.  How he had been throwing up all night.  That my Mom was babysitting him while I was out but she really doesn't like to watch him when he's sick!  We get toStudebaker and get seated.  I ordered a salad, he ordered a steak dinner.  I knew I was getting out as fast I can, so I didn't want to spend a bunch of his money.  I'm not that mean!  while we are waiting for our food, he starts talking about how exciting it was that we met on the internet.  He's LOUD!!  I know, so am I, but not when it's something embarrasing!!  The waitresses behind us were laughing!  I just wanted to crawl under the table!

Our food comes, he continues to talk while he is eating, food falling all down the front of him.  I couldn't even make eye contact.  What a mess!  I have to get out of here!  He's talking about going dancing, I'm talking about calling my mother to see how my son is in case I have to go get him!  When dinner is over, I go to the payphone to call Jules. No I didn't have a cell phone.  Jules was my partner in crime back then.  We had loads of fun!  But that's more stories for later.  So I call Jules, "Help! Help!" she starts laughing and asking how its going.  She was downtown at The Frog, waiting for us to come down after dinner.  There were a few of our friends hanging out with her, waiting to meet him.  "It's awful!"  I tell her.  She wants to know if we are coming to go dancing, I'm telling her I'll be coming, without him!  I tell her my escape plan and to come looking for me if I don't show up soon.

I head back to the table and tell him I can't go dancing, I have to go home.  Its at this point that I'm thinking he's figured out that I really don't like him and am trying to ditch him!  He leaves the table to go call his daughter and he's gone for so long that I start to think that he's ditching me with the bill!  I have enough money to cover my salad but not his steak dinner!  I start to panic, but he finally comes back to the table!  That was the only time I was glad to see him!  So he drives me back to the Comfort Inn, where my car is

Monday, September 24, 2012

Another Monday.  Man I hate Mondays.  Well at least I didn't sleep all weekend.  Saturday I went to T's football game.  That was fun.  They won!!  That always makes it really fun!  T did a great job!  I am so proud of him!!  He is such hard worker!  In school and on the field.

Taylor and her roommate/best friend Carrie came with me.  We got rained on. It was something, with all 3 of us huddling under one umbrella!  But we did.  We had fun too!!

I fell asleep early yesterday, right after I took my pain meds.  Then about 3 hours later I woke up in awful pain.  Not the usual pain.  This time it was in my throat!  Apparently I had fallen asleep too soon after taking my meds.  One of them didn't go down.  It was stuck in my throat, burning it.  it caused some awful heartburn.  I started coughing and that made me cough it back up.  Yuck yuck yuck! There's nothing quite like the taste of 3 hours old medication that disolved in your throat!!  It tasted like I had chewed it up!  It burned!  Alot!  It was awful.  I had to keep my rinsing my mouth out with water.  Then I ate a sugar free popsicle and it finally went away.

Now I'm starting to fall asleep.  Its time to go back to sleep.  Take care everyone. Have great day!!

9/18/12

Last night on my way home my van sounded like it was going to die.  It was just fine on the way to work.  No idea what happened while it was parked at work.  Maybe it's just tired of driving my ass around!  Lol  I hope it feels better today.  I have to take T to the dentist in Pickford today.

Boy is it cold today!  I took Bailey out and brrrrrrr!  I think I am finally starting to get cold!  That is one of the things that I couldn't wait for when I started to lose the weight!  Lisa said she is always cold. Wow. Won't that be nice??  I have been having hot flashes for ten years! I would rather be cold.  I can put clothes on.  When your completely overheated your just stuck.  There's only so many clothes you can take off! Especially at work!

Tomorrow it will be seven weeks since I had surgery.  I am down 32 pounds since surgery.  When I started this process in January, I weighed 315 pounds. Holy shit, huh? If it surprisesyou, imagine I felt!  I am now down to 268.  That's 47 pounds.  I like that number better! Surprisingly, that has only been one pants size.  You know your fat when.....LOL

Sadly my family suffered a loss last week.  My Aunt Linda passed away unexpectedly.  She was my Daddy's only sister.  My cousins will be bringing her ashes up so she can be buried next to her husband, Jim.  Thankfully, they did get to speak one last time.  She called to talk to Dad last week to see how his chemo and radiation is going.  It's almost like she knew something was going to happen.  Rest in Peace Aunt Linda.  You will be missed.

Have a great day everyone and don't forget to tell your family you love them.

Mon, Sept 17, 2012

Happy Monday!  Yeah, don't holler.  I don't really mean it.  I hate Mondays too.  I have been awake since 4:30.  That's when Bailey decided it was time for me to wake up.  I actually fell asleep on the couch, which is rare, and she got on the couch and pushed me off.  Either she really needed to go outside or she was tired of me sleeping in her bed!

So I swept the bathroom and kitchen then did a load of laundry.  Then when I went in the kitchen what did I see?  HORNETS!!!  Again!!  What the hell?!  Three of them.  So I stood, frozen, with a rolled up newspaper.  I thought about killing them, grabbed the newspaper and everything.  But then my fear took over.  They are moving so fast!  They aren't supposed to move that fast, this early in the morning!  One tried to sting T when he came downstairs.  I got him to kill that one but there is still 2 more buzzing around somewhere.  Needless to say I will be showering and getting the hell out of here soon!  I hope all of these animals earn their keep and kill the other two while I'm gone!

So it was another shitty weekend.  I missed T's football game on Saturday.  I was so sore, tired, depressed, just everything wrong.  I so hate that.  I hope this exasperation of my MS goes away soon.  The pain in my legs is almost too much to take.  I have so many things to do.  So many things I WANT to do.  I don't have time for this bullshit any longer!  I am taking a stand this week!  Come hell or high water, I will get this f&%king house cleaned and these extra animals out!

Thursday, Sept 13, 2012

So the lucky number for the week is 31, since that is how much weight I have lost. Lol  I just weighed myself again.  I am always afraid it was a fluke when I weighed myself last.  So I always check it again the next day.  Just want to be sure!! :)

The next thing I have to learn is how to post pictures on this.  I only have one before picture (ok, I know I have more but who wants to see anymore than one before picture!) and I have one after picture so far.  Jenn thinks we should take them every week but I say once a month.  Plus I need more time to find some of my smaller clothes!  If I still have them.  I !can't seem to locate more than a few pieces.  Makes me wonder if I got frustrated and threw them away before!  I might have.  Lord knows I wouldn't remember!!

When I was trying to figure out what to call my blog I was looking up synonyms for shrink.  I found a few I liked but decided I should name it the same thing I had always planned on naming my book.  But here are a few other things I thought would be good:

Oh yeah one more thing first.  I thought it was pretty funny that I was start looking for names for the blog, I think shrink, and of course the first thing that shows up on the synonym website is psychiatrist, head-shrinker!  Ha ha ha  Anyone that knows me knows that I should probably be speaking to a head shrinker instead of a body shrinker!!

Now back to what I was talking about.  Other names for the blog:

Withering Carla
Cringing Carla - Lol  I have enough things in my life that make me cringe!
Abbreviated Carla -  Thats CAR... um no
Slenderized! - Made me think of tenderize....um no
Condensed Carla - Just add water  Lol
Repressed Carla?  Lots in my life I have Repressed!
Quail?  I thought that was a bird??
Shortened Carla - aww yeah, I'm short enough!
Funk? Ha ha I can get funky, don't wanna be funky.  Too many meanings to that word

Carla - The Abridged Version

31 31 31 31 31

I finally did it!!  I broke 270!!  I am now 269!!  That means I am down 31 pounds! It will be 5 weeks on Wednesday.  It seems longer.  I wish it would fall off me faster.  But it didn't take me a couple of months to get this size.  It took years.  So I should be happy if I can get rid of it in a year or two.  But, it should fall off me faster!!! :)

Now if I can just find the energy to exercise I know it will fall off me faster.  But I am still tired most of the time.  Damn MS!  It tries so hard to rob me of everything.  My body, my energy, my job, my life.  I fight everyday just to get up in 

the morning. Then to go to work.  Everyday, fight, fight, fight.  It's not fair.  It's hard enough to be a single mom but then to fight my own body?  It's stupid!

Ok enough with the boo hoo's.  It's too depressing.  So school is going well for T so far.  Tay is busy with work.  Daddy is doing his chemo and radiation.  Mom is busy trying to take care of the house and daddy.  Life continues, even if your depressed. 

Well it's time to try to fall asleep.  I promise to be in a better mood next time.  Have a great night!

Sept 11, 2012

My thoughts always go to 2001 and all of the families that lost love ones when I write Sept 11.   It also makes one think of the families that are still losing love ones.  Thank you to all of the men and women that fight for our country everyday. My thoughts and prayers go out to all of them.

Sept 10, 2012

I was late to work today.  That's how my day started.  Ever since I had the surgery done my legs have been driving me crazy!  I have spasaticity (sp?) and it mainly hits me in my legs.  It drives me nuts!!!  I can't sit still, I can't get comfortable, I have to flex my toes, ankles and legs all the time!  It's like they are trying to jump out of my skin!  So now they are bothering me every night.  Which means I don't sleep.

I need to learn to be more productive.  If I am going to be awake anuways, I should clean my kitchen,  do some laundry, or whatever else needs to be done.  I am sitting here bouncing my legs up and down.  Otherwise I will go crazy!!

Tomorrow nite I am starting a walking regimen.  I am not losing weight fast enough!  Wednesday it will be 6 weeks since my surgery so now I can do more.  My doc wanted me to wait 6 weeks because of my MS.  So now I can workout and not worry.

My goal is to start running eventually.  I need to find a cheap treadmill so I can walk/run in the house in the winter.  If anybody knows someone that has one for sale, please let m know.  I really need it.  Then after football is over, T and I are going to start working out.  I am hoping to get Tay involved too.

Tomorrow night my new favorite show is on Chicago Trauma (10 pm Tues @natgeo).  I watched the first nite of the show and it's great!  The first show had a guy that was just left on a gurney.  When the nurse got him to the trauma ER room they started doing CPR.  The trauma doc had them crack open his chest and try massaging his heart.  That is when they found out that he had been stabbed in the upper thigh and had bled out.  They brought him back to life!  He had almost NO blood in his heart and they brought him back!  It's a great show.

I still need to find a home for Bailey the dog, George the Cat, Bella the cat nd Georgia the cat.  I still have to many animals!  I love them all but they have to go! If anyone  knows someone who would like any of them, please give them my number, 635.8140

Sun, Sept 9, 2012

Another weekend over.  I actually didn't sleep all weekend, just today!  Terrance and I hit a couple garage sales yesterday afternoon.  We didn't go until late so didn't get much but it was fun.  We ran into the Avon lady's garage sale. She lives over by the Middle school and we used to go to her sale every year with my Grandma.  We had to go, it reminded me of her.  I miss her.  We used to share Nora Roberts books.  When she passed away my uncle got everything and he just threw stuff away.  I wished I had gotten her books.  We shared a love of reading.  Everyone knows I have a collection of books and then I am keeping them so I can have a library one day.

My father had a very hard week last week.  He was feeling very sick from all of the stuff they have been putting in his body because of the cancer.  It was a hard week for my mother too.  Thankfully he is feeling better now so he has decided to go back to radiation on Monday.  Thank you Lord!!  On Friday he had decided to give up and given in because he felt so bad.  I am so glad that he feels better and changed his mind!

Well I know this is short, but you guys are getting used to them being short now!  Have a great week and a great tomorrow!

Wed, Sept 5, 2012

I'm trying to type this to get my mind off my legs and my left arm/hand.  My stupid spacitisity from the MS is kicking my ass right now.  I know sometimes it looks funny when it makes me bouncy but it really does hurt!  It drives me crazy.  When it takes so long to stop, even when I took my pills!  I have to keep kicking them or moving them or walking around.  My arm keeps jerking out to the left.  It's awful!

I just wish it would stop.  I hate crying.  It makes the dog stare at me and want to get on my lap.  My cat Jonesy is pretty used to it.  I can sit here bouncing my leg for an hour and he will still sit on my lap.

I watched the best show last nite, Chicago Trauma on NatGeo.  It is on Tuesday nites at 10. Everyone should watch it.  I like it because its real people, real patients, real doctors.  It is set in the hospital in Cook County, Chicago.  They said they had more people that died fromviolence in Cook County last year than peple that died in Afganistan!  That's crazy!  
In last nites episode they find a stabbing victim that was just left on a gurney by his friends.  When they start CPR the trauma surgeon says did we ever have vitals?  When he hears No, they crack the patients chest with the rib spreader and find out that he has almost NO blood in his heart!  He has them keep giving the patient blood and you literally watch his heart start pumping again!  It's crazy!

You have to watch it!  It's great!

Ok seriously, how much longer till my meds kick in? Awwwwwwwww!  I hate this!

Great, now the dog has some serious gas going on!  What else is gonna happen tonite??

Twenty-Eight!!

Yep. You read it right.  I am down 28 pounds!!  I haven't weighed this in over five years.  Hell, it's probably been ten years!!  How exciting!  I had planned on telling you all this earliertoday.  In fact I had a nice entry to my blog all typed out.  Then I got up for something,  my stupid left hand that pretty much does whatever it wants to, hit a button, and BOOM!! No more blog.  All gone.  So sad.  You guys really missed out.  It was some of my finest work.  Witty, fun to read, even a little excitement.  Oh well.

I have been lookivng at everyones first day of school pics.  How cute everyone is.  I haven't taken a picture of T on the first day of school in years.  Does that make me a bad parent??  He's been so self-sufficient for so long that most of the time I don't think he needs me at all!  He will be 16 on Christmas!  My how time flies.  My Tay will be 20 in January!   That means that it has been almost 16 years that I have been a single mom!  Wow!

You know when your kids were little and people would tell you "Enjoy it now.  It flies by"  but you never really belived that.  Especially not on bad days when they are driving you up a wall and you would wish for it to fly by.  Well now is when that comes back to bite you in the ass!

I have had a really crappy feeling day today.  I think I am dehydrated from sleeping so much this weekend.  Plus I haven't ate enough protein in the last three days.  So I was very sick to my stomach this morning.  I try to eat enough but it's not easy.  You reallyget tired of shakes, yogurt and soup!  I got to add mashed potatoes and cottage cheese but you get sick of that too.  Oh well,  just a few more weeks and then I can start adding a few more foods.

Time for me to find something to watch on tv.  I cooked T suuper (2 days in a row!), finished Tays laundry, and fed the animals.  Time for rest now.  Catch ya on the flip side.

Twenty-Eight!

That's right.  You read it right. Twenty- Eight!  I am now 28 pounds lighter!  I haven't been this weight in at least 5 years, hell it's probably more like 10 years!

I am once again watching one of my favorite movies, Jurassic Park.  It doesn't matter how many times I see it.  I love it!  If your older kids haven't seen it, they should.  Great movie.  Of course it's not as good as Aliens.  I think I have seen that movie a few hundred times. T and Tay are sick of it.  They hate when I wanna watch it again.  LOL


I can't believe its time for the kids to go back to school already.  How time flies when you do nothing all summer!!  Oh well, another summer gone by.  Maybe next year we will be able to do something.


Well it's time to go back to my movie.  Night all and have a great day tomorrow!

Labor Day Weekend

Well, as usual, I had an uneventful weekend of sleeping.  I will be glad when my energy level goes up.  It sucks being so damn tired all of the time.  If I don't take my "stay awake" pill, I'm falling asleep.  I get so sleepy all day long.  Today my sons girlfriend is coming over to watch movies.  I want to stay awake and do some cleaning, but I am barely able to type this without passing out.  That is whyI don't type on the weekends.

I have decided that two days of sleep is enough!!  I hate taking my stay awake pills on the weekend cause I need to get caught up on my sleep.  But something has to give pretty soon!  I can't sleep every weekend!  I have been for the last year or two!

I have hope that once I get skinny I won't need to sleep so much.  I want my life back.  We couldn't afford to go on vacations but we used to at least go to St Ignace to the dunes to go swimming once in awhile.  We haven't done that in years.  So sad that my kids never got to go places and do things that other kids got to do.  I have always worked and did the best I could, but it was never enough for them to get to do the fun things other families do.

I hope that they will get to do things like that as adults.  I think I have given them both good work ethics so they will be able to get what they want in life.


Okay no more boo hooing allowed!  I need to eat something and do some cleaning.  Have a great day everyone.